Come On Helen                   by Bill Thompson 

Verse one

Helen left me last Friday Night,

Said she didn’t love me cause all we do is fight. 

Packed up the kids and pulled out the Chevy,

People let me tell you that’s when my drinkin’ got heavy

Chorus

Come on Helen, don’t pull that trigger

I’ve been sittin’ on the back porch suckin’ on a jigger

Of good ole home corn squeezin’ whiskey, instead of squeezing you.

Verse two

Figured Helen’s at her ma’s, after leaving me flat

Like she was last time and the time before that. 

Meanwhile got a jug from a friend named Bill

Who got himself a still up on Thompson Hill.

Verse three

So me and the jug we settled in

Me sittin’ on the back porch with my evil twin, 

Ten days later I gave Helen a call,

Told me to fuck off and say “Hey!” to y’all.

Chorus 

Verse four

About one month later, things began to unravel

When I heard the sound of tires on gravel. 

Took a look outside to see who had come,

It was Helen on a mission with a double-barrel shotgun.

Verse five

I said, “I missed you baby” you know it’s true

She said “I got two shots and I won’t miss you!” 

 “You know I ain’t worth doin’ life in prison,

Yeah, I’m to blame and would you please just listen.”

Chorus

Verse six

I know my drinking’s got outta control,

And on our family, it’s taken a toll. 

I’m sorry to cause all this pain and sorrow,

Swear I’ll straighten things out if you come back tomorrow.

Chorus

Music, lyrics and performance by Bill Thompson.  This was a song I first wrote over 50 years ago, but over time some of the original lyrics were lost and forgotten, so I decided to revisit it and record it before it was lost again.  Features my live performance, just to keep things simple with a kind of countrified swing vibe I was seeking.  Hope you enjoy it for what it is, a silly little ditty!  lol